Don't Bring Flowers

[Fiona Hathaway]

When Fiona woke she was met with bright lights. Her eyelids fluttered open slowly as she glanced about the room. Everything felt like it was moving in slow motion for a moment, the Healer’s voices sounded far away and slurred together. She focused on a shock of red hair for a second before she could make out Paige’s sweet face smiling down at her. Fiona smiled slowly. There were quite a few healers in the room.

“Lewis,” she inquired her voice hoarse. Turning her head she looked for the signature blonde hair. Obviously she was in St Mungo’s. They made it; she felt her heart rate slow knowing she was safe, or away from Eoin at any rate.

((ooc: Hope that was okay Emma? I figured if I mentioned there being quite a few Healers you could bring in Alex or Kat if you like? And don't mind the title it's rubbish, a song I was listening to earlier.))

[Lewis Michalka]

Lewis had spend the hours since they’d arrived in Mungo’s in a variety of ways, each one such much fun naturally: pacing up and down and generally getting in the way of the Healers in Fiona’s room; talking to various members of the department, who’d arrived apropos of nothing and, wanting to know what had happened; and managed to thank Gwen who’d apparated back to the hospital to ‘check in’ after reporting for him to the Auror department heads on the events of Fiona’s rescue. And now he was currently sat wearily in a chair, head in hands, trying desperately to stay awake through the exhaustion that was finally beginning to catch up with him after weeks of fitful sleeps, overworking himself, and not enough food or water. The voices of the Healers working around the bed, upon which a very much unconscious Fiona laid, became muffled as he found his head lolling slightly and his brain become fuzzier, drifting off towards something resembling sleep. But then, all to soon, he was brought back from the edge of sleep.

Lewis looked up sharply as he heard a hoarse voice join the collage of sounds, the rustling and bustling of the Healers around the bed, and say his name. He had no doubt, despite its hoarseness, that the voice was one he knew all too well, it was Fiona‘s. “Yes, yes?” he enquired, briefly smiling his gratitude at Paige as she stepped out of the way to allow him to move to Fiona’s side. “Are you alright?” he asked and then shut his eyes in despair, shaking his head in disgust at himself, “Listen to me, of course you’re not ‘alright’, look at you… I’m sorry I… I blame lack of sleep and too much coffee,” he attempted a joke, a weak smile fighting through the fatigue shown on his face, as he sighed, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry I didn’t find you sooner and you were put through that ordeal because of it and Eoin hurt you like this and…” he trailed off, shaking his head once more as he looked down at her.

((ooc: Yep, it was great! And yep, I figure Kat will come fussing along at some point, just because she can haha.))

[Fiona Hathaway]

“Me?” Fiona asked her voice still a bit raspy, “I am the one in the Healers bed, I think someone should have a look at you,” she joked in a well-meaning manner in response to his fatigued expression. “Coffee,” she mused her eyes lit up as if he had spoken some divine word, “I need coffee. Good coffee,” she gave him the pleading doe-eyed look which at this point he really didn’t need as incentive to fetch her coffee but she wanted coffee desperately. “Going…” she coughed slightly, “…days without coffee really is not my strong suit, besides I need something for this,” she rubbed her neck and swallowed. One of the Healers handed her a glass of water. Gingerly she brought herself into an upright position waving away the help of the Healers. Taking the glass of water begrudgingly she began to sip on the liquid which was adequate but not coffee.

For a moment her eyes remained on the checkerboard of scars littering her arm holding the glass. She closed her eyes for a moment as memories of what had been done to her flashed before her eyes, particularly her legs being broken. Frantically she wiggled her toes and breathed a sigh of relief. “My legs, you fixed them,” she smiled gratefully, “Thank you,” she breathed to the room full of Healers, “And your ribs have been mended as well,” mentioned one of the Healers. As Lewis began to apologise she shook her head and placed her hands upon his, “It is not your fault,” she told him. One of the healers asked if she was ready to receive visitors, and she nodded, “We will be right outside if you need anything dear,” said one of the Healers as they gave the pair a bit of privacy. “I…” she looked down in shame and removed her hands from his, “I had the chance to kill Eoin and I couldn’t do it. That is what got me into that mess,” she gulped. Fiona smiled weakly at him even through the exhaustion and the displeasure at their current topic of conversation there were no words to describe how elated she felt at seeing Lewis’ face. She wanted to say ‘I love you,’ but moments ago she had loved another man. She felt utterly confused and the fatigue was not helping her situation.

((ooc: Aww Kat is so cute, and I LOVE Lewis by the way, sorry Fiona is so fickle at the moment.))

[Lewis Michalka]

Lewis merely rolled his eyes with a slightly strained laugh at her well meaning remark, "I'm fine, really, I-I've been overworking myself," he explained with a vague wave of his hand. He didn't want to say said 'work' in question was anxiously poring over maps and visiting practically every hideout the Deatheaters used to use in the hope of finding her so he just left it vague and unsaid. Then, looking down at her, a smile twitching at his sad expression, he shook his head, "I hate to be the one to deny you the heavenly substance but I think you should take it easy with water first-" he trailed off then as one of the Healers handed her a glass of just such liquid. He moved forward as though to help her sit up and then hesitated, also shooting a 'no, let her do it herself' looks at the Healers around them, as he knew Fiona would want to try to do things for herself no matter how badly she'd been treated and how crappy she felt at that moment.

Though appearing as merely another figure in the room full of Healers milling around, his gaze down at her was enquiring, as he noticed her eyes caught by the scars she saw on her arm. When she began to thank the Healers for healing her legs and ribs, he couldn't take it any more. Swallowing silently, he turned away from her bedside for a moment, sniffing awkwardly and his jaw tightening- this really was taking him to a place he didn't want to go. The place, the memory of it, was uncomfortable, reminding him of when he'd been in the exact same position as her and Fiona had been one of the number that came to rescue him and take to Mungo's, all bruised and scarred just as she was now. Sure his scars had long healed - except for one stubborn one on his back, running diagonally down towards his left side - but he more than anyone knew how horrible Eoin's mind games were. The fact that the same man had got to Fiona cut Lewis deeper than any scar Eoin had ever inflicted on him.

Finally turning back to face her, but the sadness very much lingering in his eyes, Lewis shook his head as she touched his hand with hers. He opened his mouth to speak but as the Healers retreated, giving them privacy, he shut his mouth again, instead sitting down cautiously on her bed, looking down at her as she talked of Eoin. Hearing her confession and seeing her expression, his brow furrowed, and he asked in bafflement, "Why on earth do you look so ashamed of that fact? There's a difference, Fiona, between wishing death on someone and actually pulling the trigger, well in the case of us wizards, casting the spell. Eoin is... it's difficult to... I'd gladly kill him, I'm not going to lie, for what he did to me, to you, to others..." he trailed off with a slight sigh, "I don't think I'll ever quite forgive him, the physical... hurt was bad but the pyschological is the one that stays with you for weeks, months, years... and I'm sorry that you were put through anything like that," he broke off once more, suddenly shielding his eyes with his hand as he felt the tears rise to the surface, he didn't want to cry, not in front of her.

Hand still over his face, Lewis tried to speak of formalities, anything to avoid discussing the emotional side of things, "Do you uh- you know want to- to talk about it or not? I hate to ask but we're-well we're going to have to say... something to the department, Gwen went to give them the field report but I... I uh... I think they'll want to speak to you... but I could speak to them instead on uh-your behalf but they'll probably send the Good Witch Glinda down too... which will brighten your day immensely, yeah?" he attempted a joke but as his voice was still shaky, it didn't quite ring true, and the smile he tried then as he finally removed his hand to look at her didn't reach his eyes, not by a long shot.

((ooc: Haha, thank you on both accounts, they appreciate it I'm sure. ))

[Fiona Hathaway]

Fiona pouted almost jokingly at Lewis when he denied her coffee, but it was probably for the best. Turning back to him after conversing for a moment with the Healers on her injuries she wondered vaguely about the large gashes which looked like a bar had run its claws down her backside. Her backside still felt a bit soar but then again every inch of her ached.

“I know but…” her voice trailed off. “I wanted to kill him, for what he did to you, and me, I really did, b-but I couldn’t do it,” she sighed. “I had him and then… something inside me gave way,” she sipped her water slowly, “And then everything went dark,” she remembered it as if it had happened two minutes ago, “Next thing I knew…” her breath caught in her throat she knew anything would be difficult for Lewis to hear let alone impossible for her to talk about, instead she quieted and fiddled with her cup of water.

“Not particularly, no,” she said as Lewis asked if she wanted to talk about it. Seeing him upset made the wee crease of worry in her brow return, “I’m sorry Lewis,” she apologised. The realisation of how utterly vulnerable she was at the moment and sobbing would come later. For the moment she preferred to be in denial a bit longer. “It is alright I can talk to them,” it would be easier to lie to the department than to Lewis. She would leave out the bit about being trained and falling in love with a prominent Deatheater for the sole purpose of killing another, Eoin, the one who had nearly killed her.

At the idea of seeing the Good Witch Glenda Fiona frowned, “Immensely,” she replied sarcastically. As she realised she was going to have to speak about everything to that nosey woman and how she ‘felt’ her chest began to rise as her breath quickened uncomfortably. She knew the tears would come soon but she had to hold off a wee bit longer. Fiona dragged her legs in toward her chest and hugged them resting her chin on her knees thoughtfully. She wanted Lewis to hold her but a part of her worried that if he did she might become a weeping mess, and she knew that when she did cry she would not be able to stop herself.

((ooc: You are welcome, haha. ))

[Lewis Michalka]

Lewis shook his head with a sad, tight smile, “ ‘Couldn’t’… that’s the main word, Fee,” he said, a touch of warmth in his voice then as he raised his gaze to look her in the eye properly once more, “We’ll both get some closure one of these days when it comes to Eoin Capaldi. But you shouldn’t want to kill me from what he did to me, I’ll fight my own battle aginast him if it ever comes down to it,” he said but, truth be told, he was being hypocritical because, of course, if their roles had been reversed and he had once rescued Fiona from torture at the hands of Eoin and then years later he’d had the chance to kill him, he would have wanted to. Whether he could actually say the two magic words of the Killing Curse were another matter entirely. Quite a liberal person by nature, Lewis nevertheless believed that condemning some people to death was the easy option, they were getting the easy way out with such a judgement, and instead he firmly believed they should be condemned to live, to face what pain their crimes had caused to the people they hurt and their families. Eoin, however, was another kettle of fish entirely, he would gladly see him come to an awful end.

Swallowing slightly he merely nodded as she said everything went dark, “I can… I think I can fill in the blanks,” he agreed grimly as she seemed to falter over her words. He knew she was as much sparing him the details as sparing herself from reliving it. “Fee, I understand more than anyone,” he assured her, smiling sadly as she fiddled with the cup in her hand, anything to distract her from the matter at hand it seemed. “Okay, well, I… well you know it’s difficult to-to talk about b-but just know I… if you ever do want to, not now obviously but later, then… you can talk to me you know? I just… I want you to know that, it’s no an easy think to deal with alone so… I-I’m here for you, if you ever need it,” he finished haltingly, stumbling over his words many times and speaking cautiously. The crease in his brow deepening he shook his head, “Don’t be sorry, you have nothing on earth to be sorry for,” he commented simply and finally, as though that were that. Looking down at the floor then as though it were the most interesting thing in the entire world - anything but look at her sitting in that bed looking so broken and fragile and un-Fiona - he looked up sharply in surprise at her next words, “Are you sure?” he checked as she claimed she would talk to the department. He frowned slightly at this but nevertheless nodded, “Alright, if that’s what you want, I- I wasn’t sure whether you’d want to so… yes, I’ll send a memo to them to tell them.”

Lewis couldn’t help but smile through it all then, and he shook his head, a laugh catching in his dry throat at her sarcastic words, “I thought that might cheer you up,” he remarked, looking to her, a little of his usual cheer glinting in his eyes, but it didn’t last very long at all as he noticed the almost imperceptible change in her breathing as she shifted to hug her legs to her chest. “I…” he started to speak and then frowned deeply, shaking his head at himself, “Well now… I don’t know what to do… I… I kind of wanted to give you a huge hug back there, I was so relieved to find you, but- but I think I might still hurt you, hmm, if I tried for one now?” he said in a lighter manner, smiling sadly at her.

[Fiona Hathaway]

Fiona could feel the pressure building inside her. Soon she would explode like a fountain of youth, except her tears would not be ones of joy but of a painful reminder of the events that followed her blackout, and what came before it. “No you don’t understand, you couldn’t, you couldn’t imagine…” her breath caught in her throat as her eyes turned glassy with the tears she was trying so desperately not to shed, “You would not understand,” she finished painfully unable to explain any further for fear of crying in front of him. She looked away for a moment and sucked in a few shaky breaths. Hold it together Fee, hold it together, only a wee bit longer now. She told herself closing her eyes for a moment. A single tear escaped. She swiftly wiped it away, as if it would be treachery if it touched the ground. “Thank you,” was all she could manage at his offer and was silent for another moment she bit her lip anxiously.

Turning back to him she nodded, “Yes,” she cleared her throat, “Yes I’m sure,” she said finding her voice again. She smiled before the panic began to build inside again. She couldn’t speak for fear of crying, instead she nodded at Lewis’ suggestion. “Please,” she chirped her voice still hoarse. Fiona was partially worried that if he hugged her he would see the large dragon tattoo on her back beneath the gashes which were probably now scars. It was given to her by Robert, well actually one of the women who worked for him Gia had done it magically. The dragon represented strength, courage, power, strong-will as well as a hidden wisdom all of which Robert believed Fiona had if she would allow herself to tap into it. At this point she could not care less if he noticed it and reached out her arms for him, “Please?”

((ooc: I hope that was okay, I wanted her to have something to take away so I thought a tattoo might work, she could get it removed of course because it’s magic but I thought people would ask questions about it? But if that is a bad idea I could always edit it.))

[Lewis Michalka]

“Couldn’t I?” Lewis asked, frowning deeply at her effort to hold back tears, shaking his head then and suddenly saying in an almost inaudible mutter, “Well there we have, everything’s the same as always, isn’t it?! I don’t understand a thing and never will and-and what’s the point in trying to even understand you or-or symp-sympathise or-or…” he trailed off then, realising he’d snapped and was merely ranting. Then, sighing heavily he shook his head, looking down at his lap, “Sorry, ignore me, I’m just a bit… exhausted,” he explained, pinching the bridge of his noise as was one of his habits when he tried desperately not to become angry. It wasn’t so much anger as an exhaustion-fuelled frustration, a kind of sad frustration, that he ‘couldn’t imagine’ and would never understand the woman that he tried so hard to do so. As such, he didn’t see her subtle struggle to hold back tears for, when he finally met her gaze again after calming himself, she was saying ‘thank you’, “Don’t thank me, just remember it,” he said simply.

Looking at her, confused by her sudden short utterances, Lewis’ brow furrowed slightly once more, “Right, yes, I’ll tell them,” he nodded, utterly unconvinced that she was as ready as the department would like for her report of what happened to be taken as valid. It was certain Amy would want ‘a little word’ to assess her mental state before any report given by Fiona was filed away. But that was a conversation for another day… hopefully at least. As the brunette nodded at his suggestion he smiled weakly but nevertheless shifted closer as she held out her arms to him, wrapping his loosely around her in an embrace- he had to hold back, he wanted to squeeze her tight and never let her go, as cliché as it sounded, but he couldn’t let himself for fear of hurting her even more than she already was. Still he rested his chin against her head, not saying anything, and merely enjoying the feeling of finally having her back ‘safe and sound’ which, to be honest, felt like a bit of a dream right then.

((ooc: Yeppp, that’s fine! I’ll have him/Idk Kat maybe (?) notice it soon-ish, if that’s okay?))

[Fiona Hathaway]

As Lewis began to rant Fiona wanted to yell back feeling utterly empty and helpless. She wanted to cry more than ever now but turned away from him instead. “I know it happened to you, and I’m sorry, but what Eoin did to you wasn’t the same as what happened to me,” she said gritting her teeth together and biting the inside of her cheek to keep herself from crying. How could she explain to him that she had fallen in love with one of her captors who in turn promised her freedom for taking someone else’s life- “No harm will come to your family, Lewis or his family, if you do this one small thing for me, I promise, now don’t get too greedy my dear, this offer is already much more generous than I had anticipated,” she could hear his velvety voice ringing in her ear. Certainly Eoin deserved to die… but not by her hand. Even he deserved a fair trial like everyone else. That was one thing that Fiona had learned from Samantha, her compassion. The mad man needed to be stopped, it was evident that he would be found guilty. “I’ll remember,” she said sadly. She loved Lewis deeply, how could she tell him she had also fallen in love with someone else. Someone who had caused her pain, granted it was nothing like Eoin. Eoin was a monster. Robert on the other hand was powerful, but he didn’t kill people simply for the pleasure of it, his method was one of survival as backwards as it seemed.

Fiona smiled, a true Fiona smile as she hugged him as tight as she could. It hurt but she didn’t care she pressed herself as hard as she could against him. She breathed deeply her breath becoming quicker. She sniffed a few times but held back the tears ready to escape at any moment, sure that she was going to breakdown. All that was left was Amy’s interrogation, that wouldn’t be too difficult, she told herself, which was a complete lie. She wanted to say I love you, and opened her mouth a few times as she turned her head to gaze up at him but the words wouldn’t come out. Instead she smiled up at him feeling a bit calmer about everything.

((ooc: Yes that sounds good and you are welcome to have Kat or Amy or Derek or all three join them at any moment?))

[Lewis Michalka]

“I never said it was, Fiona, I didn’t mean to suggest that at all. I was saying that I want to, I’ll try to, understand because I don’t want you to end up… to end up bottling everything up like you always do, like I always do, like all of us in this bloody profession do,” Lewis said in dismay, shaking his head once more and calming himself enough to continue in a calmer, more subdued and measured tone. “There are things that happened to me that-that I, to this day, haven’t told people because I was, no I still am, ashamed to speak about them. I was so close to giving up every secret in my head to Eoin, and what worried me most was how I didn’t even feel the tiniest bit of guilt that some of the information he might get out of me could help him to hurt, to kill, others… just because I wanted the pain to stop. As someone who prides themselves on loyalty and honour, I felt sick knowing how close I’d come to spilling everything, all for a momentary lapse in the torture. He told me I could join them, you know, the Deatheaters, as a sort of spy for them, a man on the inside of the Auror department, a double agent… and I-I often wonder how far away I was from saying yes just to make it all stop. I feel constantly ashamed by that precise detail of what happened, how selfish it was, and so I’d never told anyone until now.” Sighing then at the memory, he nevertheless continued persistently, “I think you’re doing the same. There’s something more than you don’t want to say because you’re, I don’t know, embarrassed or ashamed by it. I can see it in your eyes, Fiona, you should know by now that we’re both useless at hiding our feelings from each other thanks to years of companionship.” Lewis nodded solemnly then, “Please do,” he said quietly and left it at that… for the time being.

As he felt Fiona insistently hugging him closer, despite the pain it must be causing her, he reciprocated the gesture as warmly but carefully as he could, not speaking and for that moment just enjoying the feeling of having her safe again. If felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he could almost breath properly again for the first time in weeks. Releasing her then, begrudging though it was, he shifted back, but not too far away, and smiled weakly at her, “So… do you want to explain the tattoo now or shall we save that conversation for later?” he asked suddenly, trying to be light about the whole thing but his slightly lined brow showed he was confused about the thing he’d just seen a glimpse of on her back.

((ooc: The Eoin interrogation thing came out of nowhere, I went with it haha, is it too weird do you think or not?))

[Fiona Hathaway]

Fiona sank into the pillows which the Healers had propped up for her. She had been sat rigidly upright throughout their conversation but even that was too much for her. It was rather embarrassing; Fiona closed her eyes and listened to Lewis for a moment. “You shouldn’t feel ashamed Lewis,” she told him earnestly, opening her eyes to gaze up at him. “I did things I’m not proud of,” she almost whispered, talking into her lap as she shook her head. Fiona remembered one such ‘loyalty’ exercise where she had to interrogate someone forcefully. It was some poor wizarding shop owner with glasses and very little hair. Fiona threatened him while Robert lay back in the shadows. When she thought about it objectively it was a smart tactic really. Robert never showed his face unless absolutely necessary which meant he didn’t have to kill anyone, unlike Eoin who went around in willy-nilly on a killing spree. The man was released after getting the information they so desired. Something about official seals which Fiona didn’t understand.
His life was spared simply by Robert convincing whoever the big man in charge was that he might be useful in the future. That was when Fiona knew, without a doubt, that Robert wasn’t all-bad.

“Yes, but you didn’t. That’s the difference Lewis, you didn’t give any information away, you didn’t compromise someone’s life,” she said, Fiona had compromised her own life and everyone she asked to be protected, her family, Lewis, and his family. The funny thing was Robert knew who she meant by name, he didn’t ask of her any further explanation. To her that meant only one thing, someone was working on the inside. Fiona smiled, one with malice in it, “Eoin gave me no such offer,” she scoffed, “When you found me…” she swallowed, “I think-I think he was planning on killing me the slowest way he knew possible, and if he got something out of me in the eleventh hour then good for him, but I don’t think he cared,” her voice was very hoarse as she thought about that night, her jaw tighten as the emotions made her blood boil. Sucking in a deep breath she quickly shook away the feelings rushing into her tear ducts.

As Lewis spoke again tears that couldn’t be set aside by a bit of joking filled her eyes. There were many things she was ashamed of but nothing she wanted to tell anyone let alone the man she had loved for so many years. Fiona sniffed and closed her eyes causing tears to trail down her cheeks. “The-there was this girl in-in this cell with me, we were locked in a giant dungeon with some other people, older people…” she sniffed a few more times trying not to cry, the words becoming more difficult, “She was so young… she reminded me of my wee sister when she was nineteen or so,” Fiona closed her eyes again, “Eoin k-killed her in front of me… because I wouldn’t say anything,” tears began spilling silently down her cheeks, “Not even my name,” she said regrettably, in retrospect it was the stupidest thing she had ever done, “Loyalty and honour means shit sometimes,” she said in frustration a bit more loudly than she meant to and covered her face in her hands trying desperately to stop crying, “It was my fault, all my fault…” her body shook with the force of her sobs. Regaining her composure long enough to say, “I held her limp body in my arms for I don’t know how long before they came back,” she wept gasping for air, “I told Eoin everything about me, my name, birthplace, birthday, what age I was, my favourite ice-cream, that I liked coffee and those little chocolate cakes… I had snapped… but I never told anything about anyone else, nothing about the department…” her voice trailed off as she wiped the tears from her face, “I lied about my job, I said I was a lone traveling clown looking for a circus to join,” she smiled up at Lewis, and gave a small laugh, both of them knew she hated clowns with a great passion.

Being released from the hug she so dearly needed she pouted ever so slightly and then smiled up at him, perfectly happy to gaze into his eyes for the rest of eternity and remain exactly as they were. Her smile faltered slightly as he mentioned the tattoo. “Oh… it…” she sighed, “I think I’ve said enough for today,” she replied, exhausted, having no idea how she would handle Amy. “When do you think Amy will be here?” she asked anxious to get it over with.

((ooc: Sorry that was incredibly long, and a bit rubbish. Victoria would probably be the inside man, or in her case the inside woman getting information on everyone I would assume if that’s alright? If not I can change that bit.))

[Lewis Michalka]

“Shouldn’t I?” Lewis asked, shaking his head slowly as he sighed, “Sometimes, the things you feel ashamed of aren’t seen as shameful things to others I warrant you,” he admitted, looking at her sadly. He was certain that there was much, much more to her experience than she’d tell him at the moment and, honestly, he was doubtful if she would ever tell him. The reason for sharing his own up-until-then private experience was to try and get her to see that he too had been ashamed of himself for what she was now saying he shouldn’t have felt like that about, and he could quite easily do the same if she revealed the truth of what had happened to her in the months she’d been missing. He just wished she’d open up.

“Didn’t I? I’m not sure you know, some of the things I did tell them were trivial things, things that weren’t of any use, as far as I could see since I knew they’d end in cold trails and dead-ends should they pursue them but they sounded convincing enough for the moment… but I sometimes wonder…” he trailed off, the melancholy, pensive look in his eyes fading as he realised he was drifting off, and instead he shook his head to rid himself of such reminisces and bring himself back the present. Looking at her seriously as she talked of Eoin and his plans for her, his jaw tightened but he merely nodded sharply, “Don’t think about it, what might have happened if he’d got back before me and Gwen got you out, burying it is the easiest thing to do. And, yeah, I can quite easily believe that of Eoin to be honest, he’s not just dangerous, he delights in pain, it’s a sense of control, of being able to enact that much discomfort on someone else, he gets off on it,” he said dryly, almost coldly then, before he shook his head with a sad smile, “Listen to me, I sound like Amy, trying to understand someone even if they’re a cold-blooded killer.”

Lewis’ brow furrowed in concern as hot tears escaped from Fiona’s eyes and traced a path down her face as she spoke, clearly finding it difficult to form the words of the admission she was about to make. “Oh Fee,” he said gently, almost tenderly, after she’d finished, shaking his head with a sad smile, “You can’t blame yourself, I know you will, but you shouldn’t because it’s not your fault. She was in the wrong place at the wrong time and Eoin did what he did but you couldn’t have predicted that he would be so callous as to kill someone in front of you to make you talk. No one could think he’d be like that, but he is,” he shrugged simply. The briefest hint of his usual warm smile flickered then as she mentioned clowns, they both understood her level of hatred for said people; if only Eoin had too, it was almost laughable. “If you didn’t tell him anything of the department then you didn’t give him what he wanted and that’s something to be commended, Fiona,” Lewis said seriously, leaning forward then so that she couldn’t do anything but look him straight in the eye as he continued to speak, “Now listen to me,” he requested in a serious manner, gently placing his hands over hers, “Do not ever blame yourself Fiona… I should rephrase that since I’m sure you already do… do not continue to blame yourself. In the end, it won’t change anything that happened, instead it will result in you spending weeks, months, years even thinking ‘what if’, ‘just what if I’d done that or this, maybe she would have lived, maybe he wouldn’t have gotten hurt’. I’ve done it, Fee, and in the words of Shakespeare ‘that way madness lies’.”

After embracing her - for what wasn’t a sufficient enough time considering how long he’d waited to have her back, safe again - Lewis smiled lightly as she started to brush off the topic of the tattoo. He got the message, clearly she didn’t wish to divulge that particular anecdote to him anytime soon, and so nodded, “I get it,” Lewis said simply with a soft sigh. “I think Amy will be here… god only knows… as soon as she hears? If you want I can distract her before she manages to get to the room, I’ll say you’re tired and not speaking any sense at the moment and then make up some kind of nightmare I’ve had for her to analyse?” he suggested jokingly.

((ooc: Sorry this took a little while, Lewis didn’t want to work for me it would seem! And yep that sounds fab about Victoria. Btw, shall I bring in Kat next maybe, or would you prefer Derek or Amy or something?))

[Fiona Hathaway]

“Fine then,” Fiona said, “We can agree to disagree,” she made a small ‘humph’ noise. It felt good to be annoyed, better than weak and helpless at any rate. She did not want to seem angry with Lewis. He was the last person she felt anger towards. Instead she wanted to lean over and kiss him and hold his face against hers until someone pried them apart. Yet she sat there chatting.

After her admission Fiona continued to gaze into her lap and shook her head. “No, I didn’t give him any information,” the way she phrased the statement seemed to hit at the fact that Eoin wasn’t the only Deatheater she had met during her captivity. “But what if other people died because I didn’t say anything to him, I could have given him useless leads like you did?” she asked confused and tormented. She smiled however as he quoted Shakespeare, “Always the private poet,” she told him gratefully.

“No it’s fine, the sooner I get it over with the sooner she can leave,” Fiona said of Amy. Not that Amy was a mean woman, but Fiona wasn’t one to talk about her feelings and that is all she did with Amy.

((ooc: I don’t mind at all. Any one of them would be fine, I’m rather excited for Amy to come in, and Kat and Derek so really, all of them at once even haha.))

[Lewis Michalka]

Lewis nodded, "Agree to disagree, as always," he murmured under his breath as she huffed slightly. At least she was huffing like usual rather than crying, mind you he suspected that particular emotion would probably come later.

He listened along to her speech and then his eyes narrowed slightly as she emphasised 'he', "I... I don't understand... you... you didn't give him any information t-then who did you give information to? Was there another prominent Deatheater?" he asked, concernedly then, but trying to control his urgent need to know and his natural curiosity when it came to all things Eoin or related to said man and his 'colleagues'. Scoffing slightly, "Fiona, what have I just said?" he asked rhetorically, shaking his head at her, "Don't think about it, don't think 'what if', you will end up mentally torturing yourself over endless possibilities if you do," he said, his tone surprisingly firm, but he was when it came to such things. He'd spent too many years going through a similar thing and if he could nip this similar dwelling in the bud, he'd damn well try, for Fiona's sake. "Private poet indeed... or else, at the very least, Stealer of Playwrites' words," he said then, softening once more as he glanced at her.

"Right, fine, fine, fine, if that's what you really want," Lewis said, his tone utterly unconvinced, but he'd do as she wished. Looking up then as he heard the muffled sound of talking from outside - along the lines of 'I can't really allow you in there at the moment' 'I know who you are but it's not an appropriate time' - Lewis groaned and turned back to Fiona, "Well, well, speak of the devil and she doth appear," he quoted with a good-natured roll of his eyes for good measure. "Before she finally gets past the Healer and immediately starts grilling you can I have a parting hug?" he asked, putting on a jokey pleading expression, complete with big, sad puppy dog eyes, in an attempt to at least leave her on a light note rather than dwelling over their conversation or her time with the Deatheaters.